Last week we learned about the first of five factors that influence our identity, factors that are keys to helping the people we serve make lasting changes in their lives.

We have all been made wonderfully complex and full of flaws, and until we embrace who we are—including our flaws—we cannot make the changes in our lives that will bring about true transformation.

The second factor that influences our identity is our connections.

Our connections give our lives purpose, meaning, and identity. If we grew up with dysfunctional relationships, then we question our purpose and struggle with identity.

In Mark 12:30-31, Jesus said that the most important things we should do are to love God and to love other people. Life is not about our accomplishments, acquisitions, popularity, or prestige. It’s about how well we love.

There are three problems that keep us from loving fully as God intended:

1. We’re all imperfect. There are no perfect relationships because there are no perfect people.

2. Sin disconnects us. Adam and Eve had the first broken relationship and disconnected themselves from God and from each other. We’ve been excusing ourselves and accusing the people we love ever since.

3. The more disconnected we are, the more fearful we become. We crave intimacy, but we fear vulnerability. We crave acceptance, but we fear rejection.

We are a product of our relationships.

Study after study shows that our identity is largely determined by what we think the most important people in our lives think of us. That’s why we should make sure that Jesus is the most important person in our lives, because he loves us unconditionally.

We all have different connections—some healthy, some broken. It’s important to have healthy connections because they play such a crucial role in determining our identity. People with healthy relationships don’t have to ask, “Does my life matter?”

We may not have had any say in the hand we were dealt in life. But God sent his Son as our Savior to transform our “cards” into a winning hand. No matter what connections we’ve made in life, whether good or bad, we will be held responsible for what we do with our connections today.

Will we let God affect our connections? Will we trust him for our future in spite of a difficult past? Will we nurture, protect, and build relationships so that God is more fully glorified in our lives?

Resolve today to help your congregation build healthy relationships with God’s help.